My "To Do List" used to dictate my life every single day!
I loved my lists...would even add things to my list that weren't there, but that I'd gotten done, just so I could get the satisfaction of crossing it off. Sick, I know. Having items that remained undone on my list at the end of a day was cause for extreme anxiety for me.
When I was working, I even had two To Do Lists...one for work things and one for all the other stuff. If my lists got too messy or unorganized, I would have to make a new, fresh one to work from. It was bad!
Somehow...by the grace of God mostly, but also because my life is full with children...I don't have that obsession anymore. Now don't get me wrong, I definitely still have a To Do List, but it doesn't consume my thoughts and dictate my days. I feel like now it is a way to help me remember things because I've gotten so scatter-brained that I can't keep up with it all. Seriously I question some days if I might be ADD or something closely related? So I'm constantly writing things down in hopes that I won't forget. But I try not to allow my list to pressure me.
I understand so much more now that each day is unique and there is just no way to know what is in store for me, especially when multiple children are involved. All I can do is get out of bed, put my feet on the ground and ask God to be with me as I live out each moment. It is freeing for me to understand that because I was putting too much pressure on myself by trying to cross off every single item on my list every day, or make sure that things always happened at the very same time each day, or that our daily routine was exactly the same every single day...that is so NOT possible.
And the realization of that, along with eliminating the power my "To Do List" had over me, has been so freeing!
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