One of the most frustrating things for me as a parent is when I say or do things that I just know are not right. It could be a reaction to one of my children like criticizing them, or a dirty look. Maybe it's losing my temper, or not showing them grace. Or the times when I ignore them because I'm too busy, or just not in the mood to deal with them. Can anyone relate?
It makes me think about Paul somewhere in the Bible when he talks about struggling between knowing what is right and actually doing it. Of course I wasn't sure where exactly those verses were, but after much searching I did find them in Romans. And felt so encouraged when I read them because it's like he struggled with the exact same inner struggles.
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." (Romans 7:15)
"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do - this I keep on doing." (Romans 7:18-19)
That pretty much hits the nail on the head for me!
I know I should model Christ for them. I know I should be loving and patient toward them. I certainly know I need to extend grace to them and encourage them, rather than bring them down. And I know that time is whizzing by (and SO precious) so for me to ignore them or blow them off...well, I may just regret that some day! Yet in the heat of most moments I do exactly the opposite of what I want to do, or what I know I should be doing.
But what a relief to know that God extends grace...unlike me sometimes. And what hope I have in Paul's outlook on the whole situation.
"When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from the body of death? Thanks be to God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans 7:21-24)
If I can just stay focused on the Lord and what is good and pure and right...things that will build my children up and enable me to love them unconditionally. And remain aware of the war being waged against my mind. That's my goal for this summer.
2 comments:
those verses always encourage me as well. thanks for always being so transparent. love that about you! i have the same goal as you for the summer--well, that and finish our math curric, paint our house, and go to china. :)
you inspire me - thank you :)
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