My post from yesterday is still at the forefront of my mind. I am weak. I need Strength! I have tried for so long to do things my way, on my own and I have yet to succeed. You'd think that maybe I would have figured this out before I was 36 years old, but here I am. And these thoughts do not come from a place of condemnation, rather a needy and desperate heart wanting to understand and walk completely in the Light.
Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them out of the hand of the wicked They do not know nor do they understand; they walk about in darkness. Psalm 82:4-5
I need to be rescued. Many things about my life have changed over the last few years, yet I have recognized an area in my life that I am still holding onto and trying to do my way! Weakness.
Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. Matthew 26:41
My flesh is absolutely weak. Of course this is evident in many areas of life for everyone, but one area that I have identified recently is in the area of my health/weight. I am not a petite woman; never have been. There were times when I weighed less and was more in shape. It has been years. I recognize now at 36 that I am unhealthy, lazy and allow my flesh to have total control over these areas of my life.
I must draw upon strength from my Jesus if I am ever going to stop allowing food to control my thoughts, my life, really. I must cry out to the Lord to help me overcome my laziness and get into an exercise routine. I must plead with God to be my encouragement and motivation because nothing else has ever worked ~ and I have tried many, many times.
So as the verse says, I will keep watch and pray so that I will not fall to the temptations that so easily lure me in. I will pray that I will not desire to eat off my childrens' plates. I will pray that I will not take double the portion size just because it looks/smells so good...and realize that I do not need seconds. I will keep watch and pray so that I do not buy the unhealthy foods that are my downfall. I will pray that I will have self-control while cooking dinner to not take random bites from every dish as I'm preparing the meal. I will pray that exercise and fitness become an integral part of my daily life, in turn eliminating my tendency toward laziness. I will pray that my habits will change and that I will have the motivation to ensure that change.
My flesh is weak. Weaknesses abound in my life, but I am so thankful that I do have someone who understands, who is always with me, who knows every thought I have (even the thoughts I wouldn't dare admit to any other person on this planet). So I move forward in faith and prayer, trusting that the strength of the Lord will combat the weakness of my sinful flesh.
Pray for me? (That is if anyone even reads these posts...I wonder sometimes, but hey, I share what's on my heart and what I feel the Lord is prompting me to write.)
May 18, 2011
May 17, 2011
Weaknesses
We all have them ~ weaknesses. Some are more identifiable than others. Some do a fabulous job at hiding theirs. But we all struggle with weaknesses.
It is so natural to want everyone to think we have it all together; for others to think we are strong. It is easier to pretend like it's all good, rather than to be transparent and vulnerable by admitting weakness.
We have thorns in our lives. It would be ideal if God would remove them, but instead He makes available His grace. I am a weakling; I've got thorns. But thankfully I also have a God who extends His grace to me and in turn His grace can be evident in my life.
And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore, I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I can't say that I boast about my weaknesses and feel content with insults and difficulties, but Paul sure does encourage me in these verses. He reminds me to remain aware of my weaknesses and rely on God as I battle them. Then, and only then, will I be able to experience His amazing grace and put His power on display.
It is so natural to want everyone to think we have it all together; for others to think we are strong. It is easier to pretend like it's all good, rather than to be transparent and vulnerable by admitting weakness.
We have thorns in our lives. It would be ideal if God would remove them, but instead He makes available His grace. I am a weakling; I've got thorns. But thankfully I also have a God who extends His grace to me and in turn His grace can be evident in my life.
And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore, I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I can't say that I boast about my weaknesses and feel content with insults and difficulties, but Paul sure does encourage me in these verses. He reminds me to remain aware of my weaknesses and rely on God as I battle them. Then, and only then, will I be able to experience His amazing grace and put His power on display.
May 10, 2011
Mother's Day
I don't think I will ever forget this Mother's Day.
Sure, we were in Lake Arrowhead, enjoying the beauty of God's creation and time with my mom and Ted, but not for those reasons. And not because I had two, yes two, dates with my husband (no kids)!! Not even for the fact that half the time it was freezing, rainy and windy...my favorite weather.
I will never forget this Mother's Day because of the card given to me by my son. It read this way:
Mom,
the older I get, the more I realize how much it means to me to be your son...
You've given me values to live by and the responsibility to make decisions on my own.
You've shown me in many ways what makes a truly rewarding life -
like earning the respect of others and putting family first.
I'm glad that I'm you son...
and I'll always be proud that you're my mom.
Have a very Happy Mother's Day.
Words cannot begin to express the emotions I felt as I read this card from Jaylon. Of course I cried...I actually had to force myself to stay somewhat composed and not break down and sob. Many of you know the struggles Jaylon and I have had over the years. Many of you have prayed for me, for him, for our relationship. Thank you.
By God's grace, and His grace alone, Jaylon had the desire to pick his own card out for me and chose this exact one with a message that touched my heart more than he will ever know.
Thank you Lord for being faithful. Thank you Lord for softening my heart towards Jaylon and for carrying me through many difficult days and years. Thank you Lord for the grace and mercy You have shown me as I navigated through the past 13 years trying to be a mother to Jaylon. All the glory goes to God. Anything I ever did right was because of Him. And there was so much wrong that He has graciously righted and used for good.
God is good, so very good. I am truly blessed. I will never forget this Mother's Day...this card.
Sure, we were in Lake Arrowhead, enjoying the beauty of God's creation and time with my mom and Ted, but not for those reasons. And not because I had two, yes two, dates with my husband (no kids)!! Not even for the fact that half the time it was freezing, rainy and windy...my favorite weather.
I will never forget this Mother's Day because of the card given to me by my son. It read this way:
Mom,
the older I get, the more I realize how much it means to me to be your son...
You've given me values to live by and the responsibility to make decisions on my own.
You've shown me in many ways what makes a truly rewarding life -
like earning the respect of others and putting family first.
I'm glad that I'm you son...
and I'll always be proud that you're my mom.
Have a very Happy Mother's Day.
Words cannot begin to express the emotions I felt as I read this card from Jaylon. Of course I cried...I actually had to force myself to stay somewhat composed and not break down and sob. Many of you know the struggles Jaylon and I have had over the years. Many of you have prayed for me, for him, for our relationship. Thank you.
By God's grace, and His grace alone, Jaylon had the desire to pick his own card out for me and chose this exact one with a message that touched my heart more than he will ever know.
Thank you Lord for being faithful. Thank you Lord for softening my heart towards Jaylon and for carrying me through many difficult days and years. Thank you Lord for the grace and mercy You have shown me as I navigated through the past 13 years trying to be a mother to Jaylon. All the glory goes to God. Anything I ever did right was because of Him. And there was so much wrong that He has graciously righted and used for good.
God is good, so very good. I am truly blessed. I will never forget this Mother's Day...this card.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)